Shedding Skin & Starting Over

Prompted by a thread started over at PaganSpace, I got thinking about the possibility of starting over.

Not just a new blog, new screen names, new Facebook, but a whole new life.

Have you ever had the urge to just drop everything, pick up what’s precious to you, and run away?  Start over somewhere fresh, where no one knows you, no one has ties to you, and your former life as ‘nobody’ doesn’t apply?

Have you ever felt like you were playing an extra in the film of you own life?

I have to say that I absolutely have felt that way on a multitude of occasions.  Sometimes life isn’t what you expected it to be.  Things didn’t turn out the way they were supposed to when you planned them.  Sometimes, the only logical thing to do is to just leave, and try again where you don’t have the stigma of who people think you are hanging over your head.

It’s not logical, obviously.  We have families and lovers and friends and jobs and pets.

But if you wouldn’t hurt anyone by leaving, would you?  Would you start a new life somewhere else, where you could be someone else?

I would.  Hell, maybe when I’m not poor anymore, I will.  Who knows.

Anyway, just some food for thought.  <3

Maybe someday, I’ll actually write about writing again.


Filed under Life

12 responses to “Shedding Skin & Starting Over

  1. OMG! I sometimes feel like doing just that, though not right now. My life’s a silver platter of red roses now.

    And I’m always too broke for running away, anyway. :(

  2. Erin

    I would. I definitely know the feeling.

    I hope things are going well with you, even if you feel like starting over again.


  3. Yes, I’d go. Definitely. Somewhere warm.

  4. I feel this way sometimes. In fact, in about two weeks I’m headed to London for a semester so you could say I’m picking up and starting over relatively soon!

    Thanks for the food for thought. I hope you find what you’re looking for and that you’ll share your ne contact info with me if you do shed everything!

  5. I’ve had this feeling many times in my “long” life… but never gather the courage to actually do it! :-(
    It’s even tougher when “at home” you have a steady job and a paid house, while going wherever you want to go you have nothing, probably not even friends… it’s scary, indeed. But if I were younger (with the mind that I have now, when I was younger I was lazily dumb!), now I’d probably leave…
    Best wishes! :-)

  6. I completey know the feeling, which, I think, is one of the reasons I deleted Unabridged Girl (though I regret doing so now). I think it’s a common feeling. I think you’re fabulous, Kit, and it’s brave to admit and talk about something like this. But if you ran away, I might have to hunt you down.

  7. herenow

    So, ya run away, start over, and then everything settles back into exactly what you have today.
    Maybe different people, different part of the country, etc. But (I believe) it’ll all fall back in place as it was.

    What about staying in place and letting something catch up to you?
    Explore, learn and reach out from exactly where you are, right here, right now.

  8. I’d have to agree with herenow.

    I have felt the same way, but the truth is, you gotta be honest with yourself. What is it you are really running away from?

    Maybe, and I’m not trying to be presumptuous here, what you are running way from is yourself?

    You think a chance on the outside will make you feel better, more alive, more fulfilled.

    But our outer, I believe, is only a reflection of our inner state. There’s a reason why some people, even surrounded by people still feel very alone. It’s all in your perspective, I believe.

    If you are trying to run away from your life, your parents, your friends, then no luck–they’ll catch up to you.

    It’s much easier to work on what you can control, the way you see the world.

    I have homework for you. Watch this:

    I’m not saying that changing scenery is a bad idea, I just have a feeling it isn’t going to solve your immediate problem.

    Good luck!

  9. First of all, I love whatever you write, whether it’s about writing or whether it’s simply your thoughts. Just so you know, Kit.

    I can relate so well to what you’ve said here. I’ve been feeling this way for a long time – fantasizing about moving to some cool young artist area and becoming friends with awesome people and living the life that I dream of. The reason I never entertain the fantasy seriously is that a) I don’t feel, personally, that starting over somewhere would help me be more open, less shy, more “cool” (whatever that means) and confident, and, more importantly, b) friends, family, lover… cats. Couldn’t do it to them.

  10. I found your words very heart-felt, Kit. But I think that no matter where one would go…one’s self goes to. And it is one’s self that chooses who to be, and whether to let themself shine or hide in the shadows. Shining is scary…it takes a lot of courage. It’s easier to stay hidden. But we are meant to shine, I think.

  11. You guys are all so fantastic. No matter how crappy I feel, I can always count on all of you to make me feel better.

    I know disappearing is a crappy idea. Sometimes the romance of it (along with Grass-Is-Greener Complex) gets the better of me.

    I really appreciate all of you more than you realize, so thank you so much for commenting.

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